Is it as simple as they say? Just confront your fears and push forward? Does that guarantee the fear will vanish into thin air? Well, not necessarily – at least not for me.
A few ago, I found myself facing a challenge that pushed me far beyond my comfort zone. I had to upload a video of myself giving a talk for a program I was part of, Power Voice. Now, for those who know me well, you'd understand that even posting a picture of myself can be a daunting task. But a VIDEO?! That's like leaping into another dimension. Fast forward nearly 150 takes later, and I finally mustered the courage to post the video to the Facebook group. A sigh of relief, right? Well, you'd think so.
For many years, I've kept myself small, lurking in the shadows, driven by fear. Fear of judgment, fear of failure, fear of success – and how on earth do you handle compliments if they come your way? The list of fears is endless. Almost immediately after posting the video, I anxiously checked my notifications. Why hasn't anyone viewed it? Why hasn't anyone commented on it? Is it that terrible? Oh my, I look silly in the thumbnail! Why didn't I mention the sound issue in the post? And why did I have to use two different software programs to reduce the file size, causing this mess? The negative self-talk kicked into high gear.
However, something interesting happened. I soon realised that sharing the video in the Facebook group had unearthed many old wounds I thought I had healed. Instead of judging myself harshly, I saw this as an opportunity to revisit those wounds. I knew where they originated, but I was puzzled by their resurgence.
Before settling onto my meditation stool, I mentally apologised to the members of the Facebook group. I had unfairly placed them in the same category as the naysayers, even though this group was one of the most supportive and encouraging communities I've encountered. You see, this group was brimming with individuals just like me – stepping out of their comfort zones, and sharing their stories to help others navigate through life.
As I immersed myself in meditation, I realised that the emotions triggered weren't linked to the video at all. Instead, they were echoes from the past, the 'new old wounds.' These wounds weren't obvious; they were hidden beneath the surface. They were about the missed opportunities, the passage of time without meaningful progress, the fear of the unknown. Staying small and hidden felt like my comfort zone, and breaking free left me unsure of what lay ahead.
Then, something magical happened. As I watched the video of myself presenting, I felt a sense of pride wash over me. I was proud of stepping into my power, using my Power Voice, and embracing the 'new me.' It dawned on me that healing these 'new old wounds' had shown me just how far I'd come in freeing myself from the obvious ones. Wounds, my dear friend, are like layers of an onion – peel one away, and you uncover another. But that's a beautiful thing because, if you view your journey through a lens of love and non-judgment, you can celebrate the progress you've made.
Facing your fears and taking that leap is the first step in reaching your goals and breaking free from the clutches of your old ego-driven mind. It propels you forward on a path of empowerment. Every day, as you pay attention to your triggers, you become aware of the universe revealing unhealed wounds. And in healing them, you break free to embrace the magnificent journey of self-discovery.